Friday, 20 November 2009

Does it resemble?

Dad's favourite recliner chair

And the paper recliner we burnt for him. Does it resemble?

As per Taoist customary, we have prayer for Dad on 1st, 3rd, 5th and 7th week of his death at the crematorium. We usually will buy some paper offerings such as 'gold', 'silver' and 'hell notes' and burn for him.

Today is the 5th week, and we had the prayer as usual. We know he'll 'need' his favourite recliner, so we got him a replica. Cool right? Anything you want, they'll produce for you. We had, during his funeral, burnt mahjong set, DVD player, LCD TV, portable CD player, mobile phone, passport, air ticket, motorcycle, a 'Mercedes Benz' and a 3-storey house!! And 30 over huge bags of 'gold', 'silver' and hell notes. Nic joked that his 外公 is gonna be so rich that he can become a banker. haha...

Now we're just short of getting him his own private jet. hee...



Wednesday, 18 November 2009

He's a star!

This little devil was given an award for his consistent good work this year!

There's no examination for P1 kids in his school, so they were assessed through their daily class work, weekly spelling and ad hoc tests.

I've to say that this is solely his own effort that's paid off. I've not done any extra work with him. In fact, we did not even finish a quarter of those assessment books we bought. All I did was just check that he had finished him daily work and studied for his spelling. The rest was up to him. Felt a little guilty not doing anything for him. He really deserves a pat on his shoulder. We're proud of him.

Keep it up, Xiaobudian! Continue to persevere and keep up your desire for excellence. You've a long way to go! Love you.

Tuesday, 17 November 2009






It's exactly a month already....

..and the pain is still so intense.

At that exact time last night, I was unable to fall asleep. I was silently sobbing in bed, not because of him, but something else. Suddenly I recalled, a month ago, that time, we were surrounding him, sending him off with so much pain and tears. And then the thing I was sad about became so insignificant, so minute, compared to our lost.

I stopped sobbing and told myself I've to be strong, because I've a father who'd been so strong and resilient all his life.

I love you, 爸爸.

Sunday, 15 November 2009

are these really his messages to us?

got this message from Hui yesterday:

"Aunt carol, I dreamt about waigong. He was telling me he had just moved into his new house a few days ago. He was also walking like he used to when he was younger, full of vigour. Told us all not to worry."

Is Dad really trying to get the message to us? Is he really conveying all these messages to let us know he's fine? I do hope so.

Friday, 13 November 2009





A friend messaged me last night after I updated on facebook. She said she sensed Dad and he asked her to tell me,

"... your dad saw u there.. but that you need to let go..he says to take care of yur loved ones ( i sense he is esp refering to a female, not sure if its yr mom? or an elderly someone female .. he says he is fine and will be fine. "

well, I know there are pple out there who can 'sense' things or 'see' things. Usually, my logical self will always brush these off as their own imaginations. However, in this case, my emotional self has the upper hand and chose to believe that that's really what Dad wanted to tell me.


Thursday, 12 November 2009

I love Mum

Went to Mum's room to check the calendar just now and this was what I found.
She probably scribbled this onto the calendar. She misses him so much. I feel her pain, but I wont be able to understand how she's feeling now. 56-57yrs together, it's hard for us to understand.

Were you really there?

Brother came to fetch Mum just now. And he sat us down to tell us some things that went on earlier this week when they were helping out at the village temple.

The village God's birthday was on Monday, 9 Nov. He, SIL and god-nephew were helping out with preparation work at the temple till late on Sunday. They were hanging around and chit-chatting with god-brother's parents until nearly 11pm before they left. On Tue, god-nephew told Ting and god-brother's Mum that he actually saw Dad standing outside at the backyard late on Sunday night while they were chatting!!? And when Brother heard this, he questioned him, was he sure? He described that Dad was wearing exactly the same like we dressed him after he passed away. And that on Monday night, he saw Dad again when the priest was doing the prayers in the temple!? Is this real?

Well, it's been known for sometime that this god-nephew of ours seems to be able to 'see' things. So really wonder if he did see Dad at the temple. Anyway, if it's true, we're not surprised at all. Dad's been helping out at the temple since it was set up in 1972. It has grown to become part of him. It's the place where he can feel the connection with his hometown in China. All his plants are there too. In fact, we've been speculating that he's been struggling to hold on his life over the last few months just to wait for the village God's birthday. And if there wasn't 闰五月this year, then he would have lived past the God's birthday. This probably is the only regret that he had when he passed away...