原来我还是那么脆弱

这两个星期我都没什么哭了，原以为眼泪已经哭干了，原来不是的。昨晚妈才去哥那里住几天，我的眼泪都回来了！

原来妈妈成了我泪泉上的一个栓子，她在的时候，就栓住了，眼泪就不流了。她一走开，我又失去了控制心情的力量。

我觉得我好失败！一直劝哥哥姐姐们不要难过、不要哭，因为爸不要看到我们哭泣。结果呢？我自己却控制不了自己的泪水。爸，对不起，我好没用啊！

A friend messaged me last night after I updated on facebook. She said she sensed Dad and he asked her to tell me,

"... your dad saw u there.. but that you need to let go..he says to take care of yur loved ones ( i sense he is esp refering to a female, not sure if its yr mom? or an elderly someone female .. he says he is fine and will be fine. "

well, I know there are pple out there who can 'sense' things or 'see' things. Usually, my logical self will always brush these off as their own imaginations. However, in this case, my emotional self has the upper hand and chose to believe that that's really what Dad wanted to tell me.

爸，我会放下的，给我一些时间，我会做到的。你放心，我们会照顾好妈妈的，绝对不会让你失望。我永远永远都会记住和你一起的日子。我永远爱你！