40 and counting

Dad was discharged today. The last 2 days they gave him morphine syrup, some injections and a new steroid drug. An x-ray was taken for his lungs upon admission and the oncologist requested a CT scan. All was done and they decided that he should head home.

His oncologist reduced a couple of his hypertension medication and added the morphine syrup and steroid drug. Spoke to the MO over the phone when I fetched him. Apparently the CT scan was ordered because his oncologist found some unknown shadows in his chest xray. Unfortunately the CT scan confirmed his suspicion. The tumour in his lung has started spreading. They're not sure if there's any spreading through those in his lymph nodes though. But my sixth sense and daily observation tells me it has. Now the only thing that can be done is to provide symptomatic treatment as and when needed. An oxygen concentrator is recommended for standby whenever he gets too breathless.

Imagine hearing all these in front of him and having to keep a straight face. I dunno when I have learned this skill of acting. I felt so numb..so helpless..so lost...