are all old pple like that?

jus overheard my parent's mini 'squabbling' again. Dad woke up fm his nap at the sofa. Saw Mum's quilting fabrics at the other side of the sofa, and casually asked, "what are the fabrics doing there?" Mum got so sensitive and started raising her voice!? "I was just arranging them in order, what has it got to do with you? Some fabric on the sofa, got in yr way meh? Your eyes cant even bear a tiny little dirt ah!" ???!!! Dad went silent....

I'm wondering, are all old folks like that? or is it my mum? her temper seems to be getting worse these days. And the most upsetting thing is, she's taking it out on Dad. Her poor hearing does not help either. Sometimes Dad tries to tell her something, she'll 'mis-hear' it and start arguing with him. Then when she's unhappy with anything that we (the children) do, she 'dare' not tell us off, but grumble to my Dad instead. Just feel so unfair for Dad. There he is, cant bear to see her worry and decided not to let her know the truth about his illness, then has to take all these nonsense fm her. sigh...it's so unfair.

anyway, there's just no way to change my Mum. She's been so stubborn since the day I understand things. I've grown up wondering why she's not like other mothers. I've tried explaining and talking sense to her, with her always 'agreeing' to my explanations. But in the end, she still stick to her own viewpoint. I'm beginning to give up explaining things to her, or showing her more objective views. I thot I'm stubborn, but she's many times more than me. sigh...

but then again, if it's someone outside of the family that tells her something, she'll believe it 101%!? funny hor? but that's just my Mum lor.

Stress and retail therapy....

...am very stressed, for obvious reason. Tomorrow's THE DAY! am keeping my fingers and toes all crossed and hope that he'll keep his focus and attempt his paper properly. There's nothing I can do anymore except giving him my mental support. All the best to him.

...being stressed is the best excuse to SHOP! hee...cant go out much, so how? Online shopping's the answer!! spent nearly $100 already on online shopping. Gonna stop clicking the pages or the bills gonna shoot up!!!

6 more days to my freedom...............

...

it's only 23 more days to the actual PSLE....I'm cold-sweating!! but how come the actual candidate in my house is still so happy-go-lucky leh?? I wonder how long more will he be 'lucky'? Has been trying to 'wake' him since last year, but till now, he's still so relaxed. What else can I do????

sigh...my hands are cold, my feet are cold, my heart is palpitating....arrrgggghhhhhhhhhh.........

luckily I'll hv a year's break before I face this same ordeal again in 2010. I need to 滋润进补 and nourish myself before the next battle. Hopefully the second time round will be easier. sigh...

no mood....

Gosh! Jus realised I haven't blogged for more than a month! no specific reason. Jus no mood. No mood to think, no mood to write, no mood to do anything. anyway, time flies. A month jus passed like that. but actually a lot of things have happened over the month. Jus no mood to record them down. maybe later.....yawn....

emotions...

...sometimes just creeps up fm nowhere and overwhelms one.

was browsing some online fashion stores looking for suitable dress for niece's wedding in Dec. Suddenly a thot just creeped up fm nowhere. Will Dad be able to live up till her wedding??? Fear just engulfed me....

I know it's very negative of me to think this way. But I dunno. As much as I try to be positive and 'pray' that miracle will happen, I can't help but hv this fear that he'll not be with us for very long. Never hv I ever felt that my parents meant so much to me till this thing happened. I realise I am so afraid of losing them. I hate myself for not spending enough time with them. I hate myself for being so defiant when I was younger. I hate myself for being so helpless......

Just called Dad and spoke to him. 3rd sis drove them out for lunch at Changi V this afternoon. And he just had home cooked dinner. He sounded very cheerful. Made me recall what he said to me 2 days ago. He said, if he doesn't get cured, at least he knows he has tried but Heaven thinks his time is up. He'll just need to leave his final words on a couple of things, then his last wish is for a quick and easy end. He said he has no regrets and he is very happy to know that he has raised righteous and filial children and even grandchildren. He is at peace with life now and he will be ready when the time is up, although he is not giving up as yet.

As his daughter, it pains me to hear him say such things. But it's also relieving to know that he has come to terms with the whole thing. I'm not so sure about myself tho. As it is, I dun think I've come to terms with the whole issue and I'm not sure if I'll be calm enough to let him go when the time is here. I'm so scared.............

Chicken pox!!

Nic had slight fever on Wed night thru Thu morning. We thot it's just the common cold since he had some sniffing too. Ina found quite a number of red spots on his legs and cheek and we thot he was attacked by mosquitoes.

Then on Thu night, we found more red spots on his groin and neck. On close inspection, I was certain it's chicken pox though the blister hasn't appeared yet. Brought him to GP first thing on Fri morning. It was confirmed with the first blister showing on his forehead just hiding behind his hairline!

Luckily, the older boys had their taste of chicken pox already when they were much younger. I had mine some 15yrs ago. Mum also supposedly had her chicken pox and even the shingles. But Dad is not sure if he had it before. Checked with the GP and the NCCS hotline, and they all suggested separating Dad fm Nic as Dad's immunity is low and any form of infection may cause more serious problems. So out of desperation, had to send Dad (and Mum of course) to eldest sis' house. They've lived there prior to moving in with me, so that's where they felt most comfortable going back to. They'll hv to stay there till Nic's chicken pox all dried up (probably in a weeks' time) and certified non-contagious. Then I'll fetch them back again. Sorry.

Back to the little one. Never have I known that he's such a vain pot! He's so concious about the pox surfacing on his face! I've warned him to abstain fm scratching as breaking the blisters may mean leaving a possible permanent scar on his skin. This little devil took it so seriously, that he's getting upset over every new spot we found on him! haha...dunno to laugh or cry. This is a boy we're talking about and he's so concious over his looks. But that's quite like Drew when he was young (or even now).

Anyway, thus far, his outbreak is still quite alright. We counted 44 spots as of last night. Dunno if it's the anti-viral medicine (cost me $45 a bottle!!) that the GP prescribed, or his is just not a very full blown chicken pox. Or maybe it's the chicken pox vaccination he had in 2003 that's suppressing it to a smaller scale outbreak? But..but...isn't the vaccination suppose to prevent him fm getting it at all?? So much for trusting all these vaccinations!? They dun work all the time either. sigh...

Now I have headache. I'll be striped to this little monster for 24/7 for a WHOLE WEEK!!! or even more if his pox takes longer to dry up. What am I to do with a little devil who goes around saying he's bored every half hour?? OH MY GOD!!

2nd cycle started

Dad saw his doctor on Tue, and his blood tests results all turned out well. This means his body has not been badly affected by the chemo drug and he can continue to go on the 2nd cycle. Arrangement was made and he had the 1st dose on the same day. Everything went well during treatment and Dad was high spirited.


His appetite seems so good the last whole week, maybe bcos it's the rest wk of his chemo cycle. He's been asking for different things. He wanted to eat the Telok Kurau hokkien fried prawn noodle but twice we went there, they were closed. So we had the famous Beach Rd prawn/pork rib beehoon soup. Then he asked for pork kidney and I cooked it twice in a week for him. On Monday he actually asked for pig's heart! So I bought one and double-boiled with American ginseng for him. The way he craved for food is a bit like a preggie mommy's craving leh. haha... but it's great to see him craving for food. It's definitely better than seeing him no appetite and chewing bread with milk only. Hope his appetite will continue to be good.