laughter and tears do mix

Kids' school holidays is already into the 3rd week. Had a chat with Drew's FT and she was 'hinting' very directly that I shd start him on his preparation/revision for PSLE already. Gosh! It's just June!? but then again, he really need to start early since he's always taking his own sweet time. Moreover he didn't push himself to his potential during SA1, so we really need to push push push push....sigh...

Now I hear 3 kids, 10, 10 and 12, playing TOYS in their bedroom!! yup, my older boys with their cousin. My boys used to fight a lot with this cousin, Ru, simply bcos she's a girl! Now I think they're ok to involve her in their games already. dun ask me how they managed to sort things out?! it's kids' stuff.

anyway, talk to Dad last wk with 4th sis. Told him doc said he has tumour in his lungs and lymph nodes and there are 'bad' cells, and may need to hv chemo treatment. Very careful not to use the C word. His reaction came as a surprise (or shd I say a confusion) to us. He was so calm and just said "ok lor, then we go see the specialist lor." He didn't question anything like we had expected. Neither did he exclaim or anything. He only grumbled that the docs didn't say anything while he was in hospital, then now suddenly come back and say that there's bad cells and all. Yet they still cant tell him why he just cant stop coughing. Sis and I actually didn't know what else to say bcos this was not the reaction we've expected, or preparing ourselves for. So we just left it as that.

Seeing him cough really pains me. The cough comes and goes, but whenever it comes, it'll be so bad that he's like choking! His face turns all red and he seems so out-of-breath. He's been telling me this 2 days that his right chest hurts whenever he coughs. I'm wondering if it's bcos of his cough, or has his cancer cells started to spread more rapidly?? I'm scared....